Patience

This week I am learning a new lesson in patience. We were hopeful that the report from our initial assessment would have arrived before the social worker we met went on holiday last week but unfortunately she didn't have chance and so we are back to hoping it will arrive this week - preferably before we go away for 5 days on Friday (today being Wednesday).

I have found this wait to be a strange one. The first few weeks were very much 'what will be will be' as we are good people and there is no reason for us not to be invited to take the next steps but the longer I wait the more I wonder if there was something the social worker saw that she didn't like or didn't think was right - I am pretty sure I am being paranoid but it is still a worry.

The time has been used profitably. I have been able to, in this time, spend time talking to ladies who have been in this place. They have all offered me positive and informative accounts of their experiences but above all they have been honest. Honest about the difficulties they came accross and the hurdles they had to over come and that has been very refreshing. No longer is anyone hiding the 'real and full' story from me as occured so often during my infertility investigations. No longer is there any false positivity but instead sensible reaslim.

The other use of time has been that we have been able to concentrate on us for a little while - on our relationship, what we want to do and the things that make us good as both individuals and together. It has also allowed us to take some time out from life in general which has done us the world of good.