Monday, December 29, 2014

Round 2

Having a plan for the festive period is nice - I like knowing what is happening and where and it allows me to be prepared. This year it seemed to go to my plan.

I decided to invite my husband's family for Christmas Eve dinner, I like to make the effort for his Mum who always works like a trooper on Christmas day to feed everyone. Due to the increased number of meals that resemble what is essentially a Sunday lunch I decided to cook something different, something that could offer its own little hug. A form of beef stew with either mash and fresh crunchy bread followed by apple crumble and custard. My other thought was that the children could help by making the bread - keeps them occupied, involved and learning something. 

It worked!
They helped me to make the bread, set the table and were generally stars until we sat down to eat.

On Christmas Eve I also needed to make deserts for the big day - my offer of assistance and something that I do enjoy doing. This years offerings include a strawberry cheesecake and missippi mud pie and apple. The one tradition that I hate at Christmas is the puddings (but I know that his mother will have bought a Christmas pudding and mince pies - she does it ever year even when I offer to make some). The cheesecake was made by my husband and the smalls. My pie was a complete disaster. I need to get better at making pastry.

On Christmas morning we were at home - the kids and their presents got to do their thing happily and then we went to enjoy the company of family. It as a Christmas Day that was very different to last year. Last year we stayed home, had no visitors and enjoyed a day for the 4 of us. It was hard persuading the children that they didn't want to take all their new toys to their grandparents house - I tried and limit is to 2 or 3 each but I was not that successful. 

 Boxing Day I was grateful for nice weather. We all got wrapped up warm and outside. We decided on a local woods with the bikes to blow away the cobwebs and I seemed to do us some good.


Sadly oldest is finding his change of routine really hard. It has meant that his behaviour has not been as good as we would have liked and certainly no where near as good as he can be. It has caused a strain as at times I a m struggling to help him.

Tomorrow we have another treat lined up - the pantomime. We didn't take them last year as we decided that they were too little but this year I am hoping that they enjoy every second of it. Some of my happiest childhood memories include the pantomime.

Monday, December 22, 2014

Why don't people listen?


Earlier this week we attended our very first 'nativity' performance at school. All the KS1 children at oldest's school banded together to perform a non-standard performance complete with a lot of singing.
As instructed by oldest we sat as close to the front as we could manage (and on the end of the row in case youngest needed a quick escape) and I am not sure that helped as he didn't want to stand and sing with the other children and he appear, for the majority of it, distracted and uninterested. Possibly a side effect of the end-of-term-itis that he currently has along with a cough and cold. To be very fair to the children there were a lot of coughing, sneezing and sniffing going on - the head even admitted that many children were poorly so others had taken on new roles and new lines and they had adapted brilliantly.

What I did note was that the Head was very clear about the taking of photos and videos - she was happy that people could but under no circumstances were they to be placed onto social media. I thought that was fair. Sadly she wasn't listened to, a letter has since come home reminding parents of this and asking for photos on social media are removed immediately. Both in the letter and verbally she reminded people that some children were considered to be vulnerable in that their location can not be public. It frustrates me that other parents are willing to jeopardise the safety of children just to publish a few photos on Facebook.

Christmas Round 1

This weekend we got to enjoy an early Christmas thanks to my parents. My Dad has always been one of these unlucky souls that has to work over Christmas so we have tried to celebrate with him early when possible. This weekend was it.

We travelled the 80 something miles on Friday evening so we could wake up where we wanted to be - the naught Elf currently staying with us had stowed away and covered all the doorways at my parents house with wrapping paper so the kids had great fun bursting through it all! We did the first round of presents - I like to be there to see presents that I have chosen opened and so I always try to open presents with the giver. I also like to spread presents out to enjoy the fun more than just once on Christmas morning.

Anyway. within moments there was wrapping paper knee deep everywhere and so much excitement! Some amazing gifts come forth - an insect house for the garden a pair of massive Hulk hands, games, books and lovely outfit each plus a beautiful jewellery box for me. I do hope people liked the gifts we had chosen and made - the kids spent a lot of time making badges, pictures, wrapping paper and choosing other little things for people around us. The day went from game to game, pausing for an amazing lunch. My parents are both good with food - both having the bits they do best. Dad did a piece of rib beef that was fantastic and Mum is never going to be beaten for Yorkshire puddings. The afternoon moved on and all of sudden it was time to go out - tickets for the ice hockey had been booked as soon as we picked this weekend for our early Christmas as we all enjoy it.

Sunday was a calmer day - more games, colouring and waffles for breakfast but eventually home to leave my parents with some calm (as well as a lot less mess).

In other news we have sought some advice to help oldest with some anger management issues that he has, the visiting social worker hadn't seen us, as a family, for over a year and it was lovely to have her compliment us all from how the children have grown and developed to how well we seem to be working as a family. We are not perfect, not by a very long way, but we try.

Next step is my last 2 days at work for this year and then i can enjoy some time at home with my family enjoying Christmas all over again.

Ding DIng Round 2 . . . .

Sunday, December 14, 2014

Another round

Earlier this week we received another round of correspondence from the children's birth family inclusive of Christmas cards.

The envelope contained another 2 short but lovely letters both thanking us for our letters and the artwork that we include. I almost feel a little guilty that we can't include photos and so I am trying to show how they are progressing with the hand prints, drawings, paintings and writing. What I have noticed is the start of a repetitive pattern. My letters are no better. I write twice a year. My March letter is all the September term, Christmas and the New Year following by one birthday. My September letter covers Easter, the summer and the other birthday. I do try and add as much detail as possible - what they are doing, what they enjoy and any where that they have been. What I don't include is anything about wider family - I am not sure why. Maybe because I don't want to cause any upset by talking about the family that they have which must serve as a reminder that they are no longer a part of life for their birth families. But, on the other hand, I am sure the letters do that on their own.
What has made me a little sad is that we seem to have stopped getting one of the three letters that we agreed to - oldest's birthday father has not written again. I know that I will have to explain this to him in the future, these letters are his and when he wants them he can read them and I will talk to him about them. I am not sure how he will feel about the fact that there is only a single letter from his birth father. I plan to continue writing for a little while, to prove that I made the effort for my son's sake, but eventually I will stop. I can't continue writing letters that get no response.

Thursday, December 11, 2014

On with the show . . . . .

My Mum and I had a heated conversation yesterday about whether I could take youngest to the nativity pay at school - the one where oldest has a starring role. We have been allocated 2 tickets for the evening performance (as we requested - the afternoon performance would mean I would need to book an afternoon off work in order to attend) and my plan was always that youngest would sit on a knee for it. It is not going to be a long performance and she is only 3 plus I can take enough to entertain her quietly so that we can enjoy.

Mum, however, told me to check with the school as a the school where she works they do not allow younger siblings in to the evening performance. I find this completely unacceptable - it doesn't support working parents as if this was the case for us either one of us would miss the show or we would have to locate a babysitter.
I will check with the school however my recent communications to them about their lack of support for working parents will hopefully mean that they think about their responses and the needs of the families around the children who attend their school. 

Monday, December 8, 2014

A bit too big.

At the weekend we enjoyed our annual trip to see Father Christmas.

It was so different to last year. Instead of 2 scared little people I followed 2 self confident and self assured little monkeys into the room and the proudly told Father Christmas what they would like for Christmas. The photo is amazing as well - they have grown enormously and not only in size. Prior to the actual meeting we traversed the winter wonderland - a massive barn bedecked with as much as possible to alleviate the boredom of the usually epic queue. Arriving moments after opening time helped as the queue was less epic than expected and we travelled through enjoying it all, waiting only a short moment for our turn to take a ride on the train.

After this we went to choose a tree - I love a real tree, I love the smell and the fact that they are not regular. We managed to choose a tree together - it didn't look that massive in the garden centre, just bushy. My first hint of the problem to come was when it wouldn't fit into the metal drum they use to wrap the tree. It took 2 men pushing and pulling it to wrestle it through. The second clue was when we tried to get it into the car. It wasn't as tall as last year (that tree had about 3 foot cut off in order to get it into the house) but it was a lot wider. The third clue was Andrew trimming the base in order to get it to fit into our stand,

Once in the house, still wrapped, we were happy with the height. It didn't touch the ceiling. Andrew very slowly unwrapped it from the bottom, trimming out branches here and there and, once uncovered we turned it to fit in its allocation space. So much wider that it seemed in the garden centre. The kids loved it. After leaving it to settle they helped us to cover it in lights, tinsel, decorations and paper chains. It looks amazing.

This tree was a great choice for one more reason - it has no formal 'top'. At the moment we have an old star topper that has been in use for many years but neither of us like it. we have been looking to replace it and struggling to find the right topper. I am not a fan of angels, the star is a bit boring. My dad's topper is the best - a Tasmanian Devil dressed as an angel complete with halo and biker jacket. The search will continue but for this year we can manage without one as they tree has no where to put one. Perfect.

This is only our second Christmas as a family, it is hard to believe that we have been a family for less than 2 years as time has flown and I can barely remember life without them. Christmas this year will be different as we can do more, I am less scared of over facing them and, maybe because they are older, they can cope with a little bit more. We have so many new experiences to enjoy - oldest's first nativity (as a proud shepherd wearing a shepherd's costume and not his Captain America suit as first requested) and the pantonmine plus parties and so much more. We will not get our family day alone this year and I am ok with that.

In other news our visitor, Elvis the naughty elf has not been as good as hoped - more on his antics separately.

Monday, December 1, 2014

Elvis has entered the building.

This year we decided to welcome to our home for the month of December a naughty elf called Elvis. We thought it would be fun for the children as well as for us. So, last night, we set up up with a letter from Father Christmas asking he children to look after him and to teach him how to be a good elf. After the week that oldest had last week we are hoping it can improve them both! My husband had found some carpet freshening powder with a footprint stencil and so these were placed around the elf to prove that Father Christmas had really been.
 
I am so excited for him to get up to his mischief, it will be so much fun to see their faces in the morning when they get up!