Tuesday, September 11, 2012

Am I crazy?

It certainly feels like it.

On top of everything else that seems to be going on in my life at moment I am taking part in the Perkins Great Eastern Run with my friends from Ladies Circle, my husband and a few other friends to raise money for the Miscarriage Association - a charity whose services I  have had cause to use.

The sane part of me has agreed to complete the fun run, only 5km, instead of the half marathon (the thought of which fills me with dread).

So, why the MA? Not only is it the charity chosen by the National Chairwoman for Ladies Circle but it is also a charity I choose to support as I feel strongly that the service the offer to people at such a devastating time is crucial. When I found myself in the devastating situation of grieving for my lost baby the MA was the place I turned to and found so much support: it was a place to remember with people to talk about how I was feeling openly and honestly and I was understood. It was also much more available that accessing services from my GP.

So, all that leaves me to do is to ask for sponsorship:

http://www.justgiving.com/Holbeach-Ladies-Circle
I know it is cheeky but as they say, 'don't ask, don't get' and I figured every little helps. I have already had so many friends give so very generously, it reminds me that miscarriage touches so many lives and has such a devastating impact that the services the MA offer remains invaluable.

Wednesday, September 5, 2012

5 Years!

I know that it is a little late - 5 days to be exact but in all the excitement of visiting friends and our approval panel posting this fell by the wayside however I didn't want it to as I don't often have a good enough excuse to gush.

So, 5 years ago on the 1 September (2007) at exactly 2pm I married the man of my dreams.

On Saturday we spent a lovely day flying kites, walking on the front at New Brighton on the Wirral (which included fish and chips) and a fabulous Greek meal in even better company. I am not sure we could have had a better day. It was a very different day to our wedding day - much cooler weather, different locations and we are now 2 different people - made so by our experiences. One thing has not changed. We still love each and, sadly, we have had chance to prove that 'for better or for worse' we are together for the long haul.

Today I dedicate this post, along with what remains of my sanity to him and hope for many more '5 years' in the future.

Monday, September 3, 2012

Approval Panel

So, today was the day - Approval panel day. It seems to have come round so quickly in the last couple of weeks but we were really prepared for it. After agonising over the little details (what to wear, how early to be etc) we arrived in plenty of time and feeling nervous but ready.

The actual panel was 10 people sat in a horse shoe formation with us sat with our social worker facing them all. I can't remember every being that nervous of that intimidated by a group of people. They did introduce themselves and luckily they have kindly provided name tags in front of themselves to help. Then the questions started. We reckon that is lasted about 25 minutes before we were asked to wait in another room whilst they discussed our references and other confidential information. Our questions were as we expected - our finances, our re-enactment hobby and my experiences from when my parents fostered and I think, based on nerves we answered ok.

It felt like we were waiting for ages - in hindsight only about 20 minutes when our social worker came back with the panel chair and the decision makers advisor (or at least that is who I thought he was) to tell us that the panel was making a positive recommendation.

My heart skipped a beat as it does come with a but. Not a big but however one big enough to have deflated me a little bit. One comment was regarding our re-enactment, more to do with how costumes and mainly weapons are stored and kept safe and away from children so I reckon more detail in our report will cover that without problems. The other set me thinking. It was commented on that the panel thought our finances would be tight if we were to adopt a sibling group so have asked us to reconsider and just take on one at a time. At the end of the day we have we have and we thought we had enough. As did our social worker. I guess we have some more work to.

The next step is to wait for the confirmation of the approval from the adoption agency decision maker in the next 7 - 10 days. Whilst we know it is just a formality it is still another nervous wait.