After recent events and then seeing this awful article: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2140586/Scandal-babies-parents-wont-adopt-theyre-called-Chrystal-Chardonnay.html
And reading this blog post http://positiveaboutadoption.blogspot.co.uk/
I got thinking about various things including everything I am ‘loosing’ because of my infertility. I made myself a list:
· the excitement of a positive pregnancy test
· the joy of sharing this result with Andrew
· the sharing of such wonderful news with our family and friends
· seeing our baby on the scan screen
· feeling our baby move inside me
· having a bump
· going into labour
· giving birth
· holding our baby in my arms
· our baby’s first smile, cry, nappy, wave, tooth, feed, word, crawl, steps (in no particular order)
· choosing a name for our baby
· registering our baby’s birth
· shopping for our new arrival and choosing Moses baskets, cots, bedding, travel systems, clothes and everything else we might need
· introducing our baby to family and friends
· having our baby christened
The list goes on and on because infertility doesn’t give anything but it takes away everything.
I might get some things back from adopting but not everything I wanted from having a child. The more I think about that the more I accept that it is enough. What I get from adopting children will never replace what I have lost but it will be enough. It has to be.
It has also got me thinking what is in a name?
You know, I feel the same way about prematurity in a way. Yes I have had half the experiences on your list, but not some of the others and will never have that.
ReplyDeleteI think you are doing brilliantly well. I am sure you will be able to give your child a nickname should you choose, not the same, but maybe some form of compensation?