Tonight at 7.55pm, and every night this week, 4thought.tv (Channel 4's faith, morality, and ethics series) will be showing a short film asking: What matters most when it comes to adoption?
Having watched it this evening I am planning to watch the res of the week to see what other people think but my thought this evening is how would answer that question?
What matters most when it comes to adoption?
For me the matching process has to be key.
On one hand you have the adopters. They have to be honest about what they can and can not cope with, their expectations as well as their lifestyle as although life has to change when children come into your world I do think it helps to have some things in common. Plus considerations such as ethnicity, background and religious preferences. We spent some much time with our social worker working on this and, at the time, I did wonder at its importance but know I appreciate it a lot more. it had to be done and it was critical.
On the other hand you have the children who have their own requirements in a family as well as their needs whether they are medical, emotional or educational. I remember reading on our children's profile that they wanted a family with animals and oldest loves the out of doors. I think is also helps that some times we can share experiences in common - our oldest is profoundly deaf in one ear, I suffered from hearing problems as a child that were sorted with grommets.
I also believe that as part of this process physical appearance may have been considered. It certainly feels like that when I look at our children and their similarities to us in colouring.
Looking at our children and at us as well as all the information we have written down from the matching process I continue to be amazed at how well we fit together as a family.
There are a lot of other key ingredients like patience and support but I believe that had the matching process failed then we would not have fitted together as well as we have done.
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