Matching Panel – The Aftermath

After the excitement that was yesterday I thought a calmer head might be a good idea before I collected my thoughts and got something down for prosperity.

We arrived in plenty of time – 20 minutes early but as we waiting with our social working we were advised of a fire alarm and evacuation to take place as we were supposed to start so the plan was to complete the drill and then get started. The nerves were something – it is very rare that I am so nervous that I fear a repeat of my breakfast. By the time we went in, I have to confess, I was sweating buckets. The panel was a slightly different make up to the last time and the atmosphere was so different – so much friendlier and less intimidating and the questioning was so much better as well.

We were asked about our re-enactment hobby and our finances but only very briefly. The focus remained on why these children, what had attracted us to them, how we planned to parent them, to manage their medical needs, to manage contact arrangements in the future and to promote secure attachments and a positive and stress free transition from the foster carers. It was such a positive experience in comparison to our approval panel. Looking back all this felt like it took only minutes but in true is lasted about an hour before we were asked to leave and our social worker and the children’s social worker were asked to remain behind for a few more questions. Whereas last time that had lasted nearly another hour this time is was only 20 minutes and they all came out with beaming smiles to tell us that the decision to support our match had been unanimous.

My heart soared and it was all I could do not to burst into tears. The feedback was all positive, there were no concerns but rather lots of advice with reference to seeking support and a wish for us to keep them updated in the future. I had said to Andrew before we went in that I never wanted to go back but for an experience like that I would go back tomorrow (well, maybe not tomorrow but sometime in the future). They also offered some lovely comments about the family booked we prepared and handed over so the foster carers can introduce us to our children (saying that still makes me shiver – they are going to be our children!) after the stress and hype of Christmas is past.

The rest of the day was a blur – lunch at the golden arches, a few shops and an afternoon relaxing followed by a lovely meal at a local Chinese restaurant with Andrew’s parents. As this involved driving we saved our celebratory bottle of champagne for Tuesday evening at home – it was a wedding gift and we had been waiting for an occasion special enough to drink it and we decided this was it.

The next step is to wait. We have to plan the 2weeks of introductions carefully but in 3 weeks time we will meet our children for the first time and 5 weeks time we will be a family of 4.