Training Course - Part 3

The last training course was last Friday– behaviour management for the under 12s and the course I thought I would get most of on the basis of us having to manage 2 children from some time in mid January. It is a scary thought as it is not that far into the future despite me still saying it is ‘next year’. (I am glossing over the fact that is is next month!)

Before the course I recalled the talk we were given during our preparation course about behaviour management and remarks about some of the ‘super nanny’ techniques like the naughty step and time out. As a school age child I do remember being told to sit at the bottom of the stairs to think about my behaviour when I had done something naughty which is essentially a time out and the bottom of the stairs was my naughty step. The difference between me and the children I will be managing is attachment.

I had very secure attachments to my parents, I knew they were never going to leave me. I knew that they would come back for me when my time was done. When they first come to us our children will not have an attachment to us but will have to learn one and that has to take time. It is the same attachment that means a child automatically goes to a parent for comfort if there is a skinned knee or a banged head and the same attachment that allows children to find comfort from the right people and not from all with no discretion. It means that traditional methods aren't going to be the ones for us so we have be a bit more inventive.

A lot of the course centred around attachment, the different styles and what they mean is going on in a child's head and from that understanding behaviour and so being able to manage in a positive way. I came away feeling that it would be great to be able to understand our children but with an acceptable that we, like them, have a lot to learn about each other and giving time we will be ok.

So, let the countdown commence. 7 sleeps and couting. . . .