Back to School.

I have missed school.

The summer holidays have been 6 weeks long. We have done so fun things, been some lovely places and I have tried to enjoy every second but I am glad that school has re-started. It gives the children so much from stimulation to socialisation to their independence but it also gives me something. Time.

They went back at the end of last week and both children have slightly increased hours. We decided we wanted to increase them gradually in preparation for my return to work as well as in preparation for school - oldest goes in exactly 12 months time and I don't want it be to a massive shock to his system and my theory is that my increasing his hours over the next 3 terms with pre school will help. Today was the day I got a proper look around at the differences between this term and last. Oldest is in a class with the older children and it is much more structured which has to be good preparation for school.

The biggest difference has been for smallest. She is no longer the tiny child in a class full of those older than her. She is one of the biggest and, because she was there last term and all the other children are new to pre school, she is one of the most confident. It is lovely to see and based on how well she is doing I am hopeful that in the new year she might be happy to do a full day in school instead of just mornings as she does at the moment.

In other news we went on our final camping expedition last weekend. It was another re-enactment event but a slightly different one for us as all year we have been lucky with support from my mum who as helped us look after them and allowed us a little freedom to take part. This weekend she was busy so we had a plan that involved me taking time out to spend time with them and see how it all went. All I can say is that I was reminded that I am blessed with my friends, all of whom have been so supportive and watching the children interact with them brought me so much joy. It reminded me of the differences in them since they came to live with us - mainly in confidence but also in their ability to communicate and play.

But back to my point, my time, I have had 2 mornings to myself and whilst I have loved every second I have been able to collect the children having missed their company and in a better mood to really concentrate on playing with them and not the multitude of jobs that always seem to need doing.

Birthdays - Round 2

Finally, after much waiting it was oldest small's birthday. He has been waiting since he moved in with us to have his birthday and I think it is, in his mind, a test to see how we perform against his previous experiences. We have tried our best.

His actual birthday was during a camping weekend and a big fuss was made as one set of grandparents were there as was one aunt and that meant he got some cards and presents plus we had cake, singing and the bumps. As we were a long way from home we decided to wait until we got home before having a proper birthday for him - presents, another cake and a friend round to play with a picnic tea.

It brought me such joy to see his face light up when he saw his bike and even more so when we got it outside for a ride (despite being still in pyjamas!) The one downside of the day was a wasp sting - right on the end of a finger whilst using his bike but after a lot of TLC and some magic cream he was brave enough to get back in the saddle.

I am looking forward to more birthdays, especially the setting of traditions and one day I would love to do another first, a proper birthday party with kids running riot all over the place but I might wait a couple of years before I am brave enough to try that.

Out of ideas

With a little over a week until the children go back to school we have been trying to enjoy every single second whilst also battling that 'frazzled' feeling which comes of being tired and about out of ideas! It has been fun but I have to confess that I am starting to run out idea because I feel like I have gone through everything.

We seem to have gone everywhere as well - 4 mornings at holiday club, a dance class, toddler group plus local woods, gardens, nature reserves, the zoo, the beach and swimming - at our local pool as a leisure pool complete with pirate ship near my parents. The sad thought in the back of my mind is that next summer I will be back in work and will not have that much time to do so much with them but I do plan to treasure what time I will have.

Anyway, I have been working with our creative side - recent works of art we spent some time hunting round the garden for leaves, twigs, feather and flowers and then even longer sticking them onto a huge sheet of paper. We have also written letters, made cards, painted and coloured.

Our other big project was to finish some pots - a few old, washed plant pots covered in paper machie and then painted and covered in PVA. One will be used as a basket for a hot air balloon we are constructing and the others as general pots for stuff. We have already had hours of fun making them so I am pleased. I am just hoping that oldest small enjoys taking it to pre school to show his new class.

We do have another camping expedition before we return to school which I am really looking forward to although we have told the children that we are going we have not told them well in the hope that they get enough sleep to be in good moods for the journey. So far, so good . . . .

Adoption on the TV

Today on facebook I noticed the following post:

Tonight at 7.55pm, and every night this week, 4thought.tv (Channel 4's faith, morality, and ethics series) will be showing a short film asking: What matters most when it comes to adoption?

 

Having watched it this evening I am planning to watch the res of the week to see what other people think but my thought this evening is how would answer that question?

 

What matters most when it comes to adoption?

 

For me the matching process has to be key.

 

On one hand you have the adopters. They have to be honest about what they can and can not cope with, their expectations as well as their lifestyle as although life has to change when children come into your world I do think it helps to have some things in common. Plus considerations such as ethnicity, background and religious preferences. We spent some much time with our social worker working on this and, at the time, I did wonder at its importance but know I appreciate it a lot more. it had to be done and it was critical.

 

On the other hand you have the children who have their own requirements in a family as well as their needs whether they are medical, emotional or educational. I remember reading on our children's profile that they wanted a family with animals and oldest loves the out of doors. I think is also helps that some times we can share experiences in common - our oldest is profoundly deaf in one ear, I suffered from hearing problems as a child that were sorted with grommets.

 

I also believe that as part of this process physical appearance may have been considered. It certainly feels like that when I look at our children and their similarities to us in colouring.

 

Looking at our children and at us as well as all the information we have written down from the matching process I continue to be amazed at how well we fit together as a family.

 

There are a lot of other key ingredients like patience and support but I believe that had the matching process failed then we would not have fitted together as well as we have done.   

Potty Training Round 2

With the summer holidays, the lovely weather and the days we are spending in the garden we decided to see if youngest small was ready for potty training. She already used the potty and the toilet at set times during the day - before meals, bath time and bed time, the same as oldest small as we figured it would get her used to it without any pressure to actually perform. For the last few weeks she has been asking for big girl pants and we had been letting her wear them after tea time until bath time, with accidents so she could get used to them, again, with no real pressure.

So, last week we decided to take the plunge. We had a few days where we had nothing serious planned so we bit the bullet, gave her the pants and hoped for the best. I have to say that we have been amazed and I think all the work preparing her has really helped as I can sit her on day 6 and I think we may have cracked it as we have had 3 days with no accidents (except a dress getting in the way!) and today we have been out and about to do the shoe thing as well as the food shopping all accident free. Proud, me? Very.

I have fingers crossed that this success will continue, she is so independent and her smile when she tells me she has achieved something on the loo melts me plus, on a more practical note, it is saving me a fortune on pull-ups. We still need them for night time but that is one a day and not 4-6 that we were used to.

Sadly there is a slight downside. Oldest small has struggled. Mainly with his view of a lack of attention as so much has been focused elsewhere and it has lead to some of his more challenging behaviour but I am hoping this will turn around and he will realise that he has to share his parents with his sibling and it doesn't mean we love him any less or that we are any less proud of his achievements but rather than they are able to take it in turns.

In other news we have received confirmation of our celebration hearing date at the end of next month, our day to go to court with the children and meet the judge who granted their adoption order and then to have a day dedicated to them, to us and to our family.

The Planning Stages - Guest Lists

Today I managed to get the first round of invitations sent out - the few that I think have to post. I have tried to keep posting to a minimum based on the stupid price of stamps! It was lovely to walk them to the post box with the children and get them to post them: after all it is their occasion.

Their Christening.

I always wanted to have our children Christened and so, know that everything is legal we were able to start getting things booked. I started with the church and then a local pub for a buffet afterwards and then it was time to decide on a guest list and make the invitations. The guest list was where we had to decide. How big an occasion this was going to be? In the end we wanted it to be small and completed focused on them so we have tried to keep the invites down to the people who are going to play the biggest parts in their lives so our closest family and friends.

I am worried about the people that we can't invite, I would hate to offend any one but we don't want the children to be over faced by having too many people there and, practically, in keeping the guest list small we also limit the cost. My main fear for the day is how the children will behave in church but as it will be their day I am hoping the service can be aimed at them in a way that will keep their attention - at least for a little while and then I will have plenty of books and toys for the remainder of the time.

I am really looking forward to having a day that is all about them and that our family and friends can share as we decided early on that the celebration hearing at court was just for us and no one else.

Lots of fun

These last week has been great fun as we have started our summer holidays plan and we are staying busy and having a fabulous time at the same time. We have done hand and feet painting, spent hours in the garden and the paddling pool and kept to the usual routine of swimming. We have been to the seaside for a day out and we have also attended a dance class, a workshop at the pre school and the children attended one of their holiday sessions - all of which they have enjoyed.

However earlier in the week was our first planned 'special activity'. Burleigh Film Festival. I tried to choose the session with the films that the children would enjoy most so we got to see Chitty Chitty Bang Bang and then Finding Nemo. Neither kid usually has the attention to sit and watch a whole film unless they are tired and using it as a chance to re-charge but oldest sat and watch the first film from start to finish and laughed at me and his Grandma singing along.

We had a lovely picnic - nothing special or over the top as I wasn't that organised with the shopping but oldest small thought it was a real treat to eat his lunch whilst watching the TV - something we have never done at home!

I can't wait to go again next year!

But later this week it will be round 2 with a trip to the zoo - can't wait.